But What Will I Wear: March 2016

Friday, March 25, 2016

Because every girl with curves wants to wear a mumu

Sunday is Easter. I am a pastor's kid. Therefore I am required to not only show up to church but look to impress. So after I left work yesterday, I decided I would go to my favorite store in town to just see what they have. You can never have too many skirts or shirts. I can mix and match the old with the new and people can think they have never seen it before. Trust me. I get asked constantly if something is new when I have worn it a thousand times. But I digress...
I live in a small town. So my choice of plus size clothing stores in town are TJMaxx or Cato. Cato wins always. Sorry TJMaxx but you only have old lady plus size clothes and that is major annoying. There are girls with curves who want to look like they are not 68 years old. In case you haven't heard of Cato's, they are a clothing store that offers ladies and plus sizes. I like them cause they "normally" offer plus size versions of their regular sizes. They are inexpensive and great quality. I never have a problem in that store. Normally.
I walked in and start looking through to see what they have. Lots of spring colors and patterns. But the elephant in the room was the lack of seams in almost every plus size piece for sale. You name it shirts, pants, skirts, dresses and even jackets. Baggy McBaggerson. My heart was literally breaking right there in the store.

Even the model is uncomfortable

We are living in an age where for the first time a plus size model was featured on the cover of Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition. Stores like Lane Bryant are having commercials being banned on major television networks on it's body-positive message. A male plus size model has been signed with a modeling agency. So why is it that I should feel confident as a plus size woman with all that being said but instead I walk around a store and feel like there are no clothes on the market for my size?
I walk around in Target and see there are only 4 racks for plus sizes in the far back corner of the store and then the rest of the ladies clothing section is for sizes 0-12. Is it fair?
My body is mine and mine alone. I was made to be exactly as I am. You don't have to approve of my body. As long as I am comfortable in my own skin, that is what matters. But I shouldn't have to feel uncomfortable to shop for myself.
Clothes should be figure flattering to everyone. Not every single woman with curves wants to wear a mumu. If I see another shirt with flowy chiffon fabric that is longer than my butt, I will be in jail. I am sick and tired of shark bite shirts. I want princess seams and fabric that can give me shape. I can't even find a basic t-shirt without an extra yard of fabric. Is impossible for us to have skinny jeans or does every pant on the market have to be a palazzo pant?
I want to believe that there is hope in sight and things will change. But I don't see the light at the end of the tunnel. Every plus size website that I go on is all the same. I am willing to pay full retail for something that fits and looks good. I fully believe in the power of good fitting clothing. If it fits my body well, you can bet your bottom dollar I am walking out of the store with it. However, at what price am I willing to pay to wear yards and yards of fabric? When is it time to say enough is enough?
I walked out frustrated, mad as hops, and my confidence visibly shaken. I am done with retailers thinking that all plus size women want to wear potato sacks. No one wants to go shopping and feel like a whale when leaving the store. Shopping for new clothes should make you feel happy. But instead, I felt like a bloated whale.
And that is not a good feeling.

Monday, March 14, 2016

Swim Sassy: Confession of a plus size swimsuit shopper

This was the year.

The year that I ALWAYS dread with passion.
As women, I know you all must feel my pain.

The dreaded...(insert jaws theme here) Swimsuit Shopping.
AHHHHHH

It is literally a battle against the jaws of life to get me to do anything in a store related to swimwear. For many years, I have been in and out of stores on the verge of a complete temper tamper meltdown like a 3 year old kid who had their lollipop taken from them.

This year my family sent me on my own to handle swimsuit gate this year. Oh joy! They normally go to prevent me from checking into a mental hospital. I talked to myself as I normally do when going shopping as to prevent me from getting upset when things don't fit, you can't afford that right now, quit looking at the jewelry and get back on plan Haley! That kind of thing. Perfectly normal right?!?!

Because the last time I went bathing suit shopping was such a traumatic experience, I was walking into my first store in the mall like I was walking to my death.

First stop...JCP (or now JcPenneys or as I have always called it Penneys). When I got to the women's department, I noticed the small section of swim stuff and gulped with fear. I looked at all the other clothes, and granted the courage to get the job done. I started pulling things in random sizes cause I had no clue what was going to happen and didn't want to be back in the dressing room more than I needed to be. (It's dangerous when I am. Trust me.)

Round 1: Suits were OK. Nothing to make me cry but just OK.

Round 2: First suit I tried on, I saw angels with beams of light and unicorns in the background.

I am a girl with curves. I have had my fair share of battles with my weight FOREVER. I was in an odd place when I went shopping and thought that shopping for a new suit especially this year in particular was going to really mess with me. But I kicked swimsuit shopping in the butt and showed it who is boss.

Wanna know how? Check it!

My guide to plus size swim swear shopping

Support. Support, Support: Pay close attention to the straps. If you have a suit with well placed straps that give plenty of support. Thin straps are just going to make everything worse. All you will do is worry about what is hanging out and tuck and pull up your suit every time you breathe. You won't feel confident when you are worrying about that. I love halters and spaghetti straps that you can adjust.
Play up what you want to play up: If you have great legs, show them. Like your chest? V necks. Decide one part of your body that you like and play it up. You will feel so much better every time you put on your suit if you like the way your boobs or legs look. Right ladies?
Fabric can be your friend.: Stick to tankinis or a one piece. It will elongate your torso and body to make you look long and lean. Keep in mind Swim dresses as an option as it will hide hips and downplay thighs.
Find something that you love about the swimsuit itself: Patterns, cut outs, necklines are all something to look for when shopping. All of those things will make you love your suit and while on help draw attention away from those problem areas.
No matter how tempting it may be, don't try to squeeze into something that is just too small: Nothing is worse than seeing someone in a swimsuit that is just plain too tight.